Making Butterflies

Mark Le Messurier's enthusiasm is as infectious as the giggles in Mary Poppins.

Indeed it can leave his clients, and their parents, feeling as if they were floating near Uncle Albert's ceiling.

"I have an exuberance about me that could be classified as ADHD," he admits.

While Le Messurier doesn't actually have ADHD, many clients at his Fullarton Road consultancy do, or they fall on the autistic spectrum, or have other forms of learning, social or behavioural problems.

Well known and vibrant educator, Le Messurier provides a range of services for these clients: running reading recovery programs, counselling, developing social skills, creating parenting strategies and developing emotional resilience. His latest book Parenting Tough Kids draws on his experience in these areas and the strategies families use for their special needs' children, or indeed any children.

It includes tricks on how to get children to do homework, or clean their room and has a whole chapter on making friends and bullying. "A lot of my book is about how to talk to kids and build good relationships: how to avoid the school bag getting dumped, how to get kids to school," Le Messurier says.

"It's getting kids to do chores, but if chores don't work don't do it, (kids) have to be at a point developmentally where they're willing to take on chores. One mum reckons you have got to start small. They have 420 floor tiles in the back area of their house; her son just does one a week at this stage."

Le Messurier, a former teacher who was a finalist in the National Excellence in Teaching Awards when he was at Mitcham Primary School in 1995, says he has the "best job in the whole world."

"You live your work, and you live the kids you work with and the families you work with."

"I love the journey of watching kids transform."

One of his favourite caterpillar-to-butterfly stories is that of Peter.

"At eight years-old he had been to five schools that he'd been asked to move on from.

"He is autistic, at the time we called him Aspergers/ ADHD/oppositional/ and paranoid schizophrenic at one stage. Peter left high school before he finished, and Le Messurier says it was definitely for the best. I watched (him) physically and emotionally grow with the pressure of school off him.

We now have a young man at the end of the autism spectrum, he's got a part time job, he goes and learns Japanese twice a week, he's doing martial arts and he's started collecting, at a high level, military equipment."

"I think I'm just blessed and I've really enjoyed these last 13 years (in consultancy)."

Le Messurier says in the future, he would love to see, "Peter live independently, feel happy and, to top it all off fall in love with somebody and have a life where they can appreciate his beautiful differences. That would be really lovely."

Another of his success stories is Ben, who first visited Le Messurier when he was in year three.

"He was a belligerent little boy who hated reading and hated learning," Le Messurier says.

"I remember closing up all the books and I said, ‘I don't think you're ready to read just yet, but if you want to come back later that's okay.' He left looking pretty crestfallen and I felt that way too."

Three terms later Ben returned, and has worked with Le Messurier ever since.

He's now in year 11 and there's no doubt he'll do year 12 next year."

"It's lovely to see this little belligerent kid, who just hated learning, reach a point where he's a successful student, and an absolutely delightful young man, with a really secure future."

But not all the stories in the book are from clients and their families – Le Messurier's own family tips are also included. Le Messurier talks about how he and wife Sharon used "magical mystery tours" as rewards for daughters Kim and Noni.

"Today our children are young women, but their magical mystery tour memories are still vivid," Le Messurier writes. "They are both sure they did almost anything to have one of these days every so often. My recollection isn't quite the same as theirs on this matter, but these reward days certainly provided leverage towards influencing more desirable behaviours."

Mark Le Messurier doesn't believe in God, but thanks Him anyway for the runaway success of Parenting Tough Kids.

Le Messurier's How To Guide for parents originally couldn't find a publisher. Now, with 3000 pre-orders it is already in the best sellers for its market.

"It's just awesome, I'm tickled pink," Le Messurier says. "There I have been sitting at my computer tapping away for the last three years, so the response has been fantastic."